I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
