seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
