Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
