try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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