please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
