Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Randomize