would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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