the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
