Just cropdusted the office
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
