I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize