One girl and one boy is just not enough.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize