you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
did i just pee glitter
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
