it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
She just used a chaser for red wine.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
