no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
