Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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