i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Randomize
