so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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