I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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