I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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