I must be too annoying 4 u.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
