Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
