And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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