Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
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