So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
