I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize