just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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