Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
cat food counts as protein by the way
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
