So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
We got so high we made milksteak
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
