Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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