I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
