I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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