I feel like abortions should bother me more
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
