another moral hangover. fuck.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I should be sponsored by Trojan
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Randomize