Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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