You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
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