Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
there is puke in my bra ... again
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
