I don't usually arrange sex via text message
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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