I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
