And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
