shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize