thus making me awesome and them whores
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
