I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Randomize
