its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Randomize
