He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
