eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
