i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
