Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize