They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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