Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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