Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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