yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
